Ladies, 7 Virtues that could make you “perfect” marriage material!


It has been a month of weddings for me. I attend one every week.  I have observed how my boys are picking their wives now. It isn’t about beauty anymore. Conversations have been about how great the women are and not how beautiful they are. I am not a fan of weddings because I prefer a simple yet magnificent traditional marriage ceremony with a pastor present to bless it as it’s done in the church. Anyways that is me.

Guys, have you ever dated a girl you were crazy about but wished you could change that one little thing about her? What was it? Have you kicked yourself afterwards because you and your honey shared almost everything in common, yet you still broke up? So what do you really need to look for in a woman in order to build a successful marriage when ‘Miss Right’ comes along? And what does a lady need to be a ‘Miss Right’ in this computer world? I see myself talking to both sexes now. Do I change the title of the article then? Oh it doesn’t matter so let’s move on.

1.       Faith

The faith of a lady is important to guys. You ask a million ladies what they want in their ideal man and most of them will talk about a God fearing person. The same goes for the men though they don’t talk about it that much. Every guy wants a lady who knows her Creator, who believes in God and who will help his children follow the same steps. Whether the guy is a Christian or Muslim, he expects the lady to have faith in her Maker. A sense of self you might call it; a reason for living. It also includes beliefs about ethics, the importance of family, stability and, religion. For example, a purpose for life, optimism, an acceptance of others, integrity, honesty, responsibility and other similar social values. Guys don’t marry the “club girls.” They just “use” them and dump them when it’s time to settle down. Trust me, it’s the truth. Have faith. Stand for something so that you don’t fall for anything.

2.       Attraction

Physical and sexual compatibility mean different things to different people. For some, it means the physical act itself, perhaps something kinky and wild, while for others romance and intimacy play an important part. A few traits to keep in mind when looking for a missus might be her level of interest in sex, romance, foreplay, love, sexual variations and assertiveness, monogamy, communication, risk taking, playfulness, awareness of STDs and physical appearance. Every man will look for that sexual chemistry before he marries a lady. I have seen my father counsel a lot of people and he doesn’t mince words when it comes to sex. It is the engine of every marriage. Ladies, be attractive and that does not mean put on excessive make up and wear skimpy dresses. No. That turns men off because you look like a clown when you do that. Emphasis on excessive!

3.       Mothering

If you are talking about marriage, then there will be the topic of babies most often than not. It comes with it. Guys want to see if the ladies they want to marry will be good mothers. The way you treat your siblings or your neighbor’s wards will speak volumes to your guy. He wants to know that children love you and they want to come to you.  Every guy wants a lady who can be strict when need be. One who can tell children or siblings to stop doing something that is wrong. One who can motivate siblings to do something positive when they don’t have the urge to do it. Simply demonstrate that you can be a good mother.

4.       Health

Every guy wants a woman who cares for her body: a woman who prepares healthy food for her family.  One who would not be sick always or most of the time because she doesn’t care about her health. Health is wealth.  If you are always sick, it means the finances of the family would be drained. Ladies, start taking good care of your body. Exercise, eat healthy food and avoid a lot of junk. Visit the doctor every now and then. It will amaze you to know that most ladies do not know the way to the gynecologist. It’s imperative that you see the gynecologist at least once a year. I can talk about health the whole day so let’s move on. We will visit this some other time.

5.     Service

Men want women who can serve their family, friends and neighbors with a gentle and loving spirit. A lady who is charitable in everything she does. We are in a generation where most ladies do not even know how to cook. Most men are fans of food. They love food and they love good food for that matter. Also, we are in a generation where service by women is frowned upon. If a woman is able to serve her family and friends or the guy’s family and friends when they are around, she is perfect marriage material. You win guys over when they are watching football and you bring them water or biscuits or food. Your boyfriend will be so proud of you and his friends will constantly tell him how awesome you are. Service is really vital.

6.       Finances

The best wife seeks her husband’s approval before making big purchases and spends money wisely. She is careful to purchase quality items that her family needs and not any junk. I know most ladies will fight what I just said but it is very important. If you want to be the one that every guy would want to marry, take note. How a lady spends her money speaks volumes about her.  We are in a generation where most ladies do not know the meaning of an investment. Every dime is spent on clothes, shoes and expensive weave-on. If the way you handle money is nothing to write home about then you are in big trouble because those little papers make a lot of difference to every man under the sun.  I remember asking some ladies if they had EPACK or MFUND accounts and they had no knowledge about them yet they were looking for husbands. Some didn’t even have bank accounts and they are graduates. Money matters affect everyone. How a woman handles money can tell a lot about her and could make the difference between a comfortable life and an existence in poverty, so it’s important to be compatible in this area too. Pay attention to spending style, lifestyle, personal and professional goals, retirement plans, savings and ideas about money and debt in general.

7.       Industry

 Every guy wants a woman who works willingly with her hands. We are no more in the times of “housewives.” I know some guys still cherish that especially the rich ones but that is just an exception to the rule. Nothing that makes you better marriage material than having a job. Don’t be lazy. Find a decent job. If you are in school, make sure you give it your best. It’s important you become your own woman not someone who will depend on a guy for even sanitary pads at the end of the month. Be confident because confidence is sexy and study all the time. Ladies who learn how to make pastries, interior decor etc aside their careers are awesome. You can be one of them. I have been the “best man” for four weddings and I must confess I have seen a lot. Be an industrious lady and most men will fall at your feet but never let work overcome your duty to your home and family. Family comes first!

A lady who is perfect marriage material creates an inviting atmosphere of warmth and love for her family and guests. She uses hospitality to minister to those around her. She is sociable and people love her. That’s the kind of woman every gentleman wants to marry. That is inner beauty. Outer beauty is great but not all that important when it comes to marriage. It’s all about what you are going to live with for the rest of your life. How a woman thinks about the world she inhabits and how she interacts day to day are important signs of long-term mutual compatibility. Some women are casual observers of life while others thrive on being aggressive personalities. Most men want the lady who would make a home lively and fun. No added stress to that which comes with work.

If you want to avoid any neurological or/and cardiovascular disease, you go for what will give you the greatest peace of mind. These are just my opinions. Please let us hear about yours.

Advertisements

Posted on September 23, 2011, in Ghana, Lifestyle, What's new and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 16 Comments.

  1. Awesome as usual. Waiting for a similar post but for future husbands 🙂

  2. And the pic with glasses is so romantic …

  3. Great piece. I have learned a lot today.

  4. My would-be wife is in trouble if she lacks any of these. Thanks for sharing.

  5. POW!

  6. “The art of love is largely the art of persistence.” ~ Albert Ellis

  7. I agree with many of your statements but I feel as if a double standard exists.I believe women should strive for these qualities but somewhat unrealistic to have perfection in every category. In addition, does your statement,”family comes first”include men or does it solely pertain to women.

    • I know this is a very controversial topic. I love the controversy aspect of it. I know very well that no one can be perfect. I used “perfect” because every lady is a marriage material but you just need the best. I however used “perfect” in place of the “best” to bring that controversy on the open.

      Every lady who has the most of these virtues is perfect.

      I also believe “family first” goes for the men even more than the women. I say this because men are the head of the family. As the head, you must put the family first. It’s like being the president of a nation. The nation must always come first.

      Thanks for sharing your ideas on this topic. Thanks.

  8. Have reali learnt a lot keep it up.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: